New dad means more feces, vomit, breast milk — and television.

Here’s shows I’m afraid to admit I watch admittedly.

1. TMZ — I’m a reporter. The TMZ newsroom is just like a traditional newsroom, minus the back-biting, egos, layoffs and middle management incompetency.

2. Bad Girls Club.

3. The Jersey Shore: I’m late to the party. Amazed how far ‘The Real World’ concept has fallen since I was in high school (’92).

4. My Big Friggin’ Wedding: Show flew under the radar, but wow, was it watchable. ‘Tammie’ brought ignorance, even for reality television, to a new low.

5. Celebrity Rehab: Everybody likes a good train wreck. In previous seasons, you eventually felt empathy for the cast. Guys like that dude from Guns n’ Roses — or what’s his name from Alice in Chains.  This season, I find myself rooting for the demise of people like Janice Dickinson and that rich kid.